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Having a gender identity that conflicts with one's physical gender is a huge emotional burden. The anxiety, stress and depression that can result from having such a conflict can push a person to the point where everything in life that is held dear is risked to undertake one of the hardest challenges a human being can make: transitioning from one gender to the other. If you have an incongruent gender identity and are considering a gender transition to bring peace to your life, Transitions will help you understand all the implications of the journey you are about to undertake. Transitions will guide you through the transition process from end to end, teaching you how to come out to friends and family, maintain employment, manage transition finances, deal with sex and religion, plan your physical changes, pass and fit in as a member of your new gender, and more.
- Sales Rank: #1588424 in Books
- Published on: 2009-04-10
- Released on: 2009-04-10
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.00" h x .35" w x 6.00" l,
- Binding: Paperback
- 140 pages
Most helpful customer reviews
13 of 14 people found the following review helpful.
Excellent
By Tracy
Mara Christine Drummond has done an excellent job with this book. As I read this book, I saw so much of myself in there, so much of what I have dealt with. Sentences, that I have said to people that were nearly word for word. I highly recommend this book. There were times where I was laughing, times I was somber and times I was crying---such as the last paragraph in the book. Mara, I SO agree with that parargraph, I could not have said it better myself! This is a well thought out book, that is a must read for anyone that is considering transitioning. It is an easy and informative read, and she, at minimum, touches on all things and feelings that we deal with, either daily or at some point during our transition. Mara, you had my emotions flowing! Thank you for writing this book!
8 of 9 people found the following review helpful.
A fine book about an unusual and difficult journey.
By Tom Paine
Mara Christine Drummond has written a fine book that offers understanding, support and advice for those whose cognitive (mental) gender does not match their physical gender. It is known as "gender dysphoria," or "gender incongruity," also "transsexualism," and affects about one man in 40,000. In her book Ms. Drummond also addresses female-to-male transsexualism, which is even less common.
Author Drummond defines terms and has practical suggestions, based on her own experience of lifelong gender distress and her decision in 2008 to transition from male to female. She offers strategies for disclosing one's true gender preference to one's spouse, parents, siblings, children, friends, coworkers, even strangers. She emphasizes good counseling and writes, "With the help of my first therapist and friend, I found inner strength I did not know I had, and learned to accept that I was a good person regardless of the fact that I had an incongruent gender identity."
Changing one's gender is not an easy path, and Ms. Drummond doesn't pull punches. She describes "[an] unimaginally difficult road that starts with the utterance of 'I think I'm transsexual' to someone you love." She describes "this incredibly hard commitment and transformation," and, "Transitioning carries with it many hardships, physical pain, and at times, great sorrows." She also discloses the financial cost of her transition, which over three years included several facial feminization surgeries, as well as gender reassignment surgery, and finally came to over six figures. Mara Drummond, as a man, fathered two daughters and, as a grievous additional cost, lost two marriages after he disclosed his true gender preference to his spouses, and the need to act upon it.
Ms. Drummond also stresses the positive aspects of her choice. "What is life like after transition? It just feels right!... What I have is an incredible feeling that my body is finally proper. When I walk nude in front of a full-length mirror, I feel content and happy... I feel very good inside... If transitioning has done nothing else for me, it definitely gave me the courage to overcome my greatest fears, and instilled in me an immense sense of self-pride and self-worth."
She ends with, "finding inner peace should be the goal of everyone who has an incongruent gender indentity," and, "Most of all, I hope you find peace within yourself and within your life."
This is a worthwhile book for anyone contemplating this difficult but liberating journey.
5 of 7 people found the following review helpful.
Misinformation harms what is valuable in this book
By Christopher Moss
The author comes right out and says in the preface that she is not a professional and did little research to back up her pointsw. If all she did then was recount personal stories, her own or others, this would be a well thought out book.
The trouble is that out of the blue in the chapter about financing one's transition she comes out with a personal opinion about the motives of health insurance companies that is just plain wrong on two counts. Whatever one may think philosophically about gender reassignment surgery, and as an FTM myself I am more than sympathetic, it was wrong of the author to say that health insurance companies label the surgery as "experimental" and denies coverage for it in order to keep the money themselves. The fact is that insurance ccompanies will cover whatever an employer wants them to cover. If someone has a problem with their coverage not including gender reassignment, they need to take it up with their employers.
And no they don't regard trangender treatment as "experiment". They regard it as elective. Experimental treatments are those that have not even been proven to fix anything. The term she wanted was "elective". Elective treatments are those that are a personal choice. Lots of elective treatments are covered by insurance often as a matter of state regulation, like birth control and pregnancy, but they just have a berrer obby than we do. And remember, it's not the insurance companty that is paying for all this.. it's the other popele with insurance coverage. Talk to them about why birth control is covered and not transgender treatments.
My objection to this is not philsophocal but professional and literary. The author is dead wrong on matters of fact, fact she could have at least gotten the terminology right on. In an earlier chapter she counsels realizing that hiding your true gender from close friends could be interpreted as lying to them. They may never totally trust you again. I would say that this is what the gross inaccuracies about health insurance did to me. I started distrusting a lot of what the author had to say.
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